To the year 2020.

To the year 2020, I would like to say a lot. I would like to scream words that should never be said at the top of my lungs and then send it off with a few middle fingers to say the least. A year that showed so much promise and then all at once came crashing down, scattering the hopes, dreams and sadly lifes of many. To the year 2020, you won't be missed.

To the year 2020, you have taken a lot. You have taken my daughter's childhood and completely shaken it to the core. Taking everything she knows and throwing it on the floor. To a school year filled with so much promise you said goodbye to long before she even had the chance to walk through those doors. Each Holiday has come and gone in a way no Holiday ever should as a little kid. To the year 2020, you are the year that took away the innocence of so many little boys and girls.

To the year 2020, families began this year whole and for 200,000 plus they will say goodbye to this year a little less full. They will wake up each day left in this year and the next and the next after that with an empty seat or two at the table, but more then that, a huge hole in their hearts. To the year 2020, you were the year far too many had die alone and say goodbye way too soon.

To the year 2020, you were the year the world all at once came to a halt. When life as we know it was thrown completely upside down. The world caught fire, black people were murdered, jobs slipped through our fingers, life events were put on hold or cancelled all together and the people of this nation became dividied further then before. To the year 2020, you will go down in history but for all the wrong reasons.

It would be so easy for myself to continue writting this blog from the perspective of all things bad 2020 has caused. I'm not alone in saying that as I'm sure we all have our own never ending lists of bad things to say. But as we end this hell of a year, I want us all to think about the good things, no matter how big or small that forever changed us in a positive way. So to the year 2020, thank you as well.

To the year 2020, I can't believe I am saying this, but thank you. Thank you for bringing a new precious addition to our family, one that came at such a gloomy time for many and has brought a new light to our lifes. Thank you for reminding us what truly matters, because at the end of the day we may not still have our fancy cars or phones, but we will always have our family. And that, that is the greatest and most precious gift of all.

To the year 2020, thank you for showing me the strength I didn't know I had. For helping me to be a better mom, daughter and teacher. Even if that meant teaching to just one student in the four walls of my home, thank you for giving me the time to better myself. Thank you for giving me back the confidence and self worth in my own abilities that I had so lost, but in this time home have once again found in a new light.

To the year 2020, thank you for the promise of a better tomorrow. Like they always say you can't go down from here, only up, and I truly believe that. While this year was not the one we planned, it is the one that set us on the path to do better, to be better people. To show your neighbors and random strangers on the street a little more kindness. To not even for a second take for granted the brave and tired emergency personal, doctors, nurses etc., ever again. To judge others a little less, pray a little more and love like there is no tomorrow. Thank you for the promise of a better future with new restored hope in our president elect. For showing little girls all over the world they can be or do whatever they want to, especially my own. To the year 2020, thank you for reminding us to not take even a second on this earth for granted.

To the year 2020, thank you for giving me extra time with my sweet girl. While this time may not of come in the form I wanted it do, I am grateful. Next fall she will head off to kindergarden, ready as ever I've told myself and with that head of hers held high. Our days will no longer revolve around endless hours of play or snuggles on the couch, a new normal will come about, but I will forever be grateful for the year before that I got to spend with her, safe at home. A time to say the least that I wasn't expecting to get but have cherished every second of it. To the year 2020, thank you for the countless moments and memories I have been lucky enough to of had with my daughter.

To the year 2020, you were a doozy. And while I may have anger, regret and many emotions about this year, I will choose to go into the New Year with nothing but hope. Because if there is anything this year has shown us, its this; no matter how horrible of a time it is, there are still good people in this world, things to smile about and that from the ashes we will rise. When this smoke of 2020 clears we will come out on the other side ready for whatever 2021 will throw at us, a little better prepared, more grateful and a hell of a lot stronger. To the year 2020, this too shall pass.

~Hope is the only thing stronger then fear.~

Photo credit to the amazingly talented Jillian Varnea Photography