Thanks but no thanks

You know the phrase "If you don't have anything nice to say don't say it at all?" Well I truly believe there should be one for unwelcomed parenting advice. Something along the lines of "If I didn't ask for your advice I don't want it." Harsh? Probably. But maybe then it would get the point across.

Pregnancy tests should really come with a warning on their boxes that says "positive result may end in an abundance of unwanted advice and judgement." Because let me just tell you I was not at all prepared for that part of parenting. I swear even before my daughter was born it came a knocking on my door and believe me when I say it wasn’t welcomed with open arms. I constantly got the "you need to eat more", "don't be like those women who gain a bunch of weight", and best of all "don't name your kid that." I’ll say it again and again, GET OUT OF MY UTERUS!

I figured once she arrived all that would come to a screeching hault (silly old me)....boy was I wrong. Since the moment I brought her home my life has been swarmed with opinions and advice of anyone and everyone. And I mean anyone, even strangers at the store who see her without a coat on (sorry I like my kid to be safe in the car).

It seems as if you cant do anything anymore without being judged or adviced otherwise. Let your kid play in the dirt? Judged. Formula feed your baby (oh gosh the world if going to end)? Judged. Co- sleep? Judged. Have a C-section? Judged. Mothers have enough to worry about so let me say this loudly for the people in the back, WE DONT WANT YOUR ADVICE. Mothers know their kids best, parents know how to parent their children accordingly and you know what, if all else fails we will figure it out from our mistakes.

I know this may be hard to hear but my daughter watches tv, she gets dessert, more nights then not her dinner is chicken nuggets (in the shape of dinosaurs of course) and she gets to stay up late. She even closed out the dance floor at my brothers wedding this past year *GASP*. But best of all, she's a go with the flow routine kind of girl, everyday is different. I don’t dare mention any of that in a mom group because doing so would open myself up to an insane amount of ridicule and advice on how to be a “better” parent. Why cant we all just mind our own business and parent however we want?

I am not a perfect mom and I have yet to meet one that exsits. There are a million and one ways to be a good parent, no one way is alike and that's a beautiful thing. How boring would our world be if we all created and raised the exact same kind of kid? I may not be raising the next "perfect” straight A student or top business women, but I am raising her to be whatever she wants to be. And even if that means a Disney princess (just please pick anyone besides Elsa) or a unicorn, as long as she's happy, I'm happy. At the end of the day they all end up throwing tantrums in the middle of the groccery store anyway...yes even your prodigy child.

So lets make it a priority this year and every year going forward to fully support other moms, no matter what way they may choose to parent. In place of giving unwanted advice and judgment, let’s simply ask instead how we can help or go as far as complimenting another mom. You never know how far a little bit of kindness may go.

~Encourage one another and build each other up~1 Thessalonians 5:11